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Old 11-08-2007   #1
Raist Classic
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R.L. Stine Reveals Slappy From "Night Of The Living Dummy" Was Gay

NEW YORK—Children's author R.L. Stine broke his long-held media silence Monday to announce that Slappy, the evil ventriloquist's dummy from the Goosebumps Night Of The Living Dummy trilogy, was a homosexual.

"This is not completely unexpected," said Goosebumps fan Ned Kosorowski, who has long speculated that the fictional wooden doll preferred the company of men, and has even written fan fiction describing graphic sexual encounters between Slappy and Amy's father. "Slappy's constant attempts to break out of the closet that Amy stores him in at night clearly represent his struggle with homosexuality—as well as his deep-seated, repressed feelings for [rival ventriloquist's dummy] Mr. Wood."

Stine refused to address rumors regarding the possibility that Greg from Say Cheese And Die—Again! suffers from bipolar disorder.
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Old 11-08-2007   #2
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Fuhuck. Well... what's next? Ren and Stimpy weren't good role models? I'll refuse that reality and substitute my own.
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Old 11-08-2007   #3
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I spent years trying to forget I read/watched the stories about that doll. He'll haunt me again, I'm sure.
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Old 11-08-2007   #4
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Is this a gag on the dumbledore hing - or are you guys serious...?
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Old 11-08-2007   #5
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Is this a gag on the dumbledore hing - or are you guys serious...?
Look at what forum we're in >.>
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Old 11-08-2007   #6
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Look at what forum we're in >.>
Ditto.

But seriously. This reeks of onions.
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Old 11-09-2007   #7
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Umm.....why did he even bother to make any kind of announcement about this?
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Old 11-09-2007   #8
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Umm.....why did he even bother to make any kind of announcement about this?
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Old 11-09-2007   #9
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I did see that Gunny but still you know I wanted to play along.
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Old 11-09-2007   #10
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Gunny oft ruins the moods.

Man, I always suspected this, though. Night of the living dummy stories were creepy as beans.
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