Chicken Little
07-24-2007, 09:43 AM
Product Information
Publisher: Activision
Developer: Activision
Genre: Sci-Fi Action Adventure
Release Date: Jul 4, 2007 (more)
ESRB: EVERYONE 10+
ESRB Descriptors: Violence
Extras: 1-4 Players 'offline multiplayer' exclusive content on Wi Fi 'Allspark Wars'
Review
Ah Transformers, after that terribly average attempt at a transformer game by Atari on the PS2 (yay using the most shittest of shit series in Energon you wankers) finally a decent game on the DS. With 2 separate games which really are only different in the story based dialogues and really just how much of a damn terror you can be, this game really is quite enjoyable in single player, though it really shines in online and multiplayer.
Story / Plot
It follows the recent movie plot as one would expect once they saw the games or the release date of it, however the buck really stops there as the game does branch off to involve the robots in a greater form in the games, unlike having that 1 instance where you see Ratchet shoot something or Starscream as a jet. It's still;
Autobot: 'the Allspark is on Earth, so is Megatron who's frozen and held by Sector 7. We must reach it no matter the cost!'
Decpticon: 'the Allspark is on Earth, so is Megatron who's frozen and held by Sector 7. Free Megatron, get the Allspark eliminate even the toughest stains!'
Music
As best as you could expect, thank god that the DS isn't terribly loud though as every time you meet Bumblebee your ears bleed just a little bit more. The background music, like any game is prone to getting repetitive if you stay in one area, however it's tolerable as the music is intermingled with radio broadcasts from police and general suburban noise. The SFX, you can admire why they make it so loud considering the background banter, but you really don't need to hear it with the amount of times you run into shit, transform or even take a damn step.
Controls
Average, as really there's too much to do if you want to do things properly. Steering of any vehicle uses the D-pad, in aerial mode the shoulder buttons are also used to strafe. The buttons are used to either speed up/down, lower/increase altitude, melee attack or long/short range fire and all the while to transform you have to use the stylus and to change vehicles in freeplay you have to use the start button. Unless you have 4 hands you're going to end up getting frustrated at times when you need to get away quickly but at the same time you need to quickly swap to robot mode to kill some shit, you will slow down and in some cases (when your wanted level is sky high) that means anal rape.
Gameplay
As with any game that's a free roaming AA (Action Adventure), especially in this case there are similarities to GTA. The underlying factor is you need to scan various vehicles to assume their form so that you then have a wide array of vehicles, both on wheels and in the air so that you won't get stuck on anything and so that your stats can constantly change. Yes there's a level system in place, as you kill shit, complete objectives or pissfart around playing the minigames you gain EXP, EXP levels you up and as you gain levels you can extra features or a stat increase (eg: Level 7 you gain the ability to fire your ranged weapon while in vehicle form) Other then that it's mission based, and there are two type of missions:
Story missions
These are the plot advancement, and in the Autobot version are denoted by a green ray of light covering the Autobot signature.
Mini Game Missions
Are denoted by a star and yellow beams, and can range from 'Wield a weapon and destroy as much shit as you can in 30 seconds' to 'run like a pansy boy and see how long before you die'
So the gameplay is pretty much regimented:
Step 1: Get initial vehicle.
Step 2: Get additional vehicles and destroy random drones to gain EXP.
Step 3: Do the missions and unlock new areas and such
Step 4: Return to Step 2.
I say it is like GTA in the sense, because instead of high jacking vehicles you scan them to get their form. And instead of beating up on people, you beat up on whole vehicles.
Version Specific
Since this game is on or will be on all the 'next gen' consoles, PC, handhelds and the PS2 it would be great to note just how well the DS version would stack up, since after all one of the key features of that is the touch screen. Now don't get me wrong, which the touch screen adds to the amount of shit you have to do it makes it a fuckload more simple to do it. You want to pull up a map, point at the map icon, you want to transform, point at your sides logo, you want to scan point at the scan icon. It is also great as far as customisation goes. You got a new vehicle, change the colour scheme by using the sylus to cycle through, you want to see the robot mode, same thing with the logo. I honestly cant see anything besides perhaps the Wii or PC to have such 'ease' for the range of features that the DS gives in this regard, the rest will most probably lump it into some form of menu which pauses the game.
Votes
Story / Plot: 6
Music: 4
Controls: 7
Gameplay: 7
Fanbase: 6
Features: 9
39/60 (65%)
It's a good game, you could play it for hours and never get tired of it, it's just there's really too much going on for people to just pick up and play and people will get shitty with the sub par music if they get stuck, and you will get stuck regardless.
Ending Cook (aka Fly's Whiney Bitch)
Bumblebee, sucks giant fucking energon nutsacks. Seriously the guy needs to get a fucking clue on what it means to be anything but cannon fodder. His range attack is like a fuckign 2 year olds, his melee strength is like he's jacking off while he's fighting and the only thing decent about him is his agility (which means yay he's fast at getting his ass handed to him). As a vehicle, holy fucking crap on a stick, yeah he's fast but you can't outrun shit if you have dick all for handling and it's quite fucking obvious his head goes down to his crotch when he transforms, because his handling is non existent.
Ironhide.. fucking champion, he's a real mans Autobot and Bumblebee wishes he was but a damn sparkplug on Ironhide buttcheek to get as goddamn beefy as he is.
Eat a damn dick and die Bumblebee, I'm gonna borrow Decpitcons just so I can school your fucked up hippy ass!
Publisher: Activision
Developer: Activision
Genre: Sci-Fi Action Adventure
Release Date: Jul 4, 2007 (more)
ESRB: EVERYONE 10+
ESRB Descriptors: Violence
Extras: 1-4 Players 'offline multiplayer' exclusive content on Wi Fi 'Allspark Wars'
Review
Ah Transformers, after that terribly average attempt at a transformer game by Atari on the PS2 (yay using the most shittest of shit series in Energon you wankers) finally a decent game on the DS. With 2 separate games which really are only different in the story based dialogues and really just how much of a damn terror you can be, this game really is quite enjoyable in single player, though it really shines in online and multiplayer.
Story / Plot
It follows the recent movie plot as one would expect once they saw the games or the release date of it, however the buck really stops there as the game does branch off to involve the robots in a greater form in the games, unlike having that 1 instance where you see Ratchet shoot something or Starscream as a jet. It's still;
Autobot: 'the Allspark is on Earth, so is Megatron who's frozen and held by Sector 7. We must reach it no matter the cost!'
Decpticon: 'the Allspark is on Earth, so is Megatron who's frozen and held by Sector 7. Free Megatron, get the Allspark eliminate even the toughest stains!'
Music
As best as you could expect, thank god that the DS isn't terribly loud though as every time you meet Bumblebee your ears bleed just a little bit more. The background music, like any game is prone to getting repetitive if you stay in one area, however it's tolerable as the music is intermingled with radio broadcasts from police and general suburban noise. The SFX, you can admire why they make it so loud considering the background banter, but you really don't need to hear it with the amount of times you run into shit, transform or even take a damn step.
Controls
Average, as really there's too much to do if you want to do things properly. Steering of any vehicle uses the D-pad, in aerial mode the shoulder buttons are also used to strafe. The buttons are used to either speed up/down, lower/increase altitude, melee attack or long/short range fire and all the while to transform you have to use the stylus and to change vehicles in freeplay you have to use the start button. Unless you have 4 hands you're going to end up getting frustrated at times when you need to get away quickly but at the same time you need to quickly swap to robot mode to kill some shit, you will slow down and in some cases (when your wanted level is sky high) that means anal rape.
Gameplay
As with any game that's a free roaming AA (Action Adventure), especially in this case there are similarities to GTA. The underlying factor is you need to scan various vehicles to assume their form so that you then have a wide array of vehicles, both on wheels and in the air so that you won't get stuck on anything and so that your stats can constantly change. Yes there's a level system in place, as you kill shit, complete objectives or pissfart around playing the minigames you gain EXP, EXP levels you up and as you gain levels you can extra features or a stat increase (eg: Level 7 you gain the ability to fire your ranged weapon while in vehicle form) Other then that it's mission based, and there are two type of missions:
Story missions
These are the plot advancement, and in the Autobot version are denoted by a green ray of light covering the Autobot signature.
Mini Game Missions
Are denoted by a star and yellow beams, and can range from 'Wield a weapon and destroy as much shit as you can in 30 seconds' to 'run like a pansy boy and see how long before you die'
So the gameplay is pretty much regimented:
Step 1: Get initial vehicle.
Step 2: Get additional vehicles and destroy random drones to gain EXP.
Step 3: Do the missions and unlock new areas and such
Step 4: Return to Step 2.
I say it is like GTA in the sense, because instead of high jacking vehicles you scan them to get their form. And instead of beating up on people, you beat up on whole vehicles.
Version Specific
Since this game is on or will be on all the 'next gen' consoles, PC, handhelds and the PS2 it would be great to note just how well the DS version would stack up, since after all one of the key features of that is the touch screen. Now don't get me wrong, which the touch screen adds to the amount of shit you have to do it makes it a fuckload more simple to do it. You want to pull up a map, point at the map icon, you want to transform, point at your sides logo, you want to scan point at the scan icon. It is also great as far as customisation goes. You got a new vehicle, change the colour scheme by using the sylus to cycle through, you want to see the robot mode, same thing with the logo. I honestly cant see anything besides perhaps the Wii or PC to have such 'ease' for the range of features that the DS gives in this regard, the rest will most probably lump it into some form of menu which pauses the game.
Votes
Story / Plot: 6
Music: 4
Controls: 7
Gameplay: 7
Fanbase: 6
Features: 9
39/60 (65%)
It's a good game, you could play it for hours and never get tired of it, it's just there's really too much going on for people to just pick up and play and people will get shitty with the sub par music if they get stuck, and you will get stuck regardless.
Ending Cook (aka Fly's Whiney Bitch)
Bumblebee, sucks giant fucking energon nutsacks. Seriously the guy needs to get a fucking clue on what it means to be anything but cannon fodder. His range attack is like a fuckign 2 year olds, his melee strength is like he's jacking off while he's fighting and the only thing decent about him is his agility (which means yay he's fast at getting his ass handed to him). As a vehicle, holy fucking crap on a stick, yeah he's fast but you can't outrun shit if you have dick all for handling and it's quite fucking obvious his head goes down to his crotch when he transforms, because his handling is non existent.
Ironhide.. fucking champion, he's a real mans Autobot and Bumblebee wishes he was but a damn sparkplug on Ironhide buttcheek to get as goddamn beefy as he is.
Eat a damn dick and die Bumblebee, I'm gonna borrow Decpitcons just so I can school your fucked up hippy ass!